The DA

England manager Fabio Capello’s method of pulling player names out of a hat have been questioned once again following an embarrassing draw which will see Frank Lampard captain England against World champions Spain. The Chelsea midfielder, who has failed to leave the centre circle for the national side going on 14 months now, will be forced to put on his serious face and try those really s*** shots he does every 5 minutes whilst Spain laugh in our faces.

Speaking to the press Capello defended his methods saying ‘I have’a a very big hat. It can’a be hard to find everybody. I mark Wayne Rooney so easy to find but other not so easy. Micah Richards and David Beckham obviously still at bottom. I shuffle, but not so well. That take’a the effort.’

The draw has also led to a shock recall for retired goalkeeper David Seaman after his name was dropped into the hat by mistake, using one of Graham Taylors old post-it notes. Capello added ‘David has done very well, probably. I no see him but then I no watch anyone really. When at game I have iPad and many funny Youtube clips. Can I drink red wine now?’

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