The DA: About Us | Subscribe
From The Offside: UEFA Champions League | Premier League | La Liga | Champions League Tickets | Noticias de Futbol
From World Cup Blog: Euro 2012 Qualifying | 2012 Africa Cup of Nations Qualifying | USA Soccer
Former Manchester United quiet man Paul Scholes has decided he wants to make up for lost time and comment on absolutely everything, according to Paul Scholes. The ten time Premiership title winner told everybody he could possibly get round to that Carlos Tevez was actually quite a nice guy, and that you should stop being such a prick.
Continue reading »
Manchester City want away Carlos Tevez has refused to be suspended causing uproar around the football world. City boss Roberto Mancini told the former Manchester United star of his ban in a private meeting to which the Argentinian shook his head angrily before turning to punch Pablo Zabaleta. Tevez later released a press statement saying ‘I didn’t refuse to be suspended. Now if you’ll excuse me I’ve got some training to do; big match Saturday.’
Continue reading »
Roberto Mancini has said the heated dialogue between he and Carlos Tevez last night will forever be between him and the striker. But using expert lip readers on whopping salaries we’ve uncovered what was actually said:
Continue reading »
Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson has told a television interview that television has too much power and that it should be stopped at all costs. Speaking ahead of this week’s Champions League game, due to be televised so that everybody can see it, the Scot claimed ‘if TV wasn’t powerful I wouldn’t be able to sit here and tell you how powerful it was and get everybody’s attention…Do you see how f***ed up that is?!!’
Continue reading »
After a long, record breaking career of being unbelievably s***, Aston Villa defender Richard Dunne has finally agreed to learn how to kick a ball forwards after manager Alex Mcleish warned him that failure to take up the training might result in his axing. The Republic of Ireland international broke his own best last night after firing in his centurion own goal to cost Villa a crucial 3 points and the former Blackpool beach donkey said enough was enough.
Continue reading »
If someone can explain the sense of this to me, I’d be much obliged. Is football slowly eating itself?
(Sent by Paddy Stoate via our Facebook page)
QPR captain Joey Barton has admitted he almost didn’t make up the complete and utter lie that Arsenal tried to sign him this summer, claiming to have nearly just told the truth instead. But the former Newcastle United midfielder said he believes the decision was changed after a close friend told him that QPR were historically nowhere near as good as Arsenal, forcing Barton to concoct some unbelievable bullshit.
Continue reading »
Still has leg
There was shock this morning after video replays revealed that Owen Hargreaves did manage to kick a football last night without crumbling into hundreds of tiny little pieces. Medical experts say the feat is ground-breaking, given that his leg is now held together with some extra strong Prickstick and a couple of staples.
Continue reading »
Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger has admitted to a press conference full of journalists that he was ready to relieve himself in his underpants after Shrewsbury took an early lead in their Carling Cup tie at the Emirates stadium last night. Speaking candidly to reporters he said ‘I turned to Pat Rice and signalled that I was about to shit all over the touchline. I then caught a glimpse of the chairman and thought to myself ‘booollllocks.’
Continue reading »
Stable owner Michael Owen will get a once in a lifetime chance to pretend he plays for Manchester United after Sir Alex Ferguson revealed he really didn’t care at all about a Carling Cup game against Leeds. Owen, who often uses Twitter to make believe he drives around on the same team bus as the Old Trafford first team tweeted ‘I can’t believe it! I actually get to wear the shirt and everything!’
Continue reading »