The world has politely asked Copa America finalists Uruguay if they wouldn’t mind winning a trophy some other time, after Paraguay’s semi-final victory last night left glamour model Larissa Riquelme just one game away from fulfilling her promise of running round the city centre naked. Riquelme, a huge fan of the national side made the promise prior to kick-off of the Copa America tournament and like gentleman; most of Paraguay’s opposition has thus obliged to the historic ‘wing man’ rule and not stepped in the way of progress.

But fears are mounting that Uruguay may be blinded by the thought of lifting the sought after trophy and key officials in South America have urged them to put everything into perspective. Paraguay president Fernando Lugo told them ‘winning a cup isn’t the be all and end all. You get to drink champagne for a while sure, but then what do you have? Please Uruguay, I beg you to look at the picture above just one more time. Take as long as you need. But do the right thing.’

Paraguay have yet to win a game outright in the tournament and have drawn most of their encounters 0-0 before relying on penalty shoot outs to see them through. A FIFA spokesman claimed ‘I really, really, really don’t care.’

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