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The DA’s Richard Cutcher brings you some of the funniest football video clips doing the rounds this week:
There are many swear words media outlets ‘um’ and ‘ah’ over in terms of the context and time they can be safely broadcast. The word ‘c**t’ however is generally considered a tad offensive. Not for BBC North West it seems…
For those who have yet to hear about record breaking Histon FC, they became the first club on record in the top 5 divisions of English football not take one away fan with them to last weekend’s clash against Wrexham. Always a fan of the true underdog here, the DA has decided this simply can not stand and have declared ourselves Histon FC’s long lost supporters. Here are some quick facts that surely only a true fan would know:
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Manchester City are preparing to release last season’s financial results in a move that is likely to make your credit card bill seem not so bad. In what many have described as the worst business model since the Fred Goodwin doll (on sale at Toys ‘R’ Us outlets since early last year) City are expected to have over spent by more zeros than can possibly fit onto one annual statement.
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Sir Alex Ferguson has told his players they can forget the idea of Mike Phelan dressing up as Santa Claus this year, as it’ll probably only turn some of them on. The news comes after Ferguson’s furious reaction to Wayne Rooney’s private life being exposed by tabloid newspapers and the Manchester United manager also looks set to ban Halloween and Easter, leaving Phelan at least £1,000 out of pocket at Rocky’s Fancy Dress shop.
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The DA continues the Footballing Cities United Tour in Derby
The trip to Derby began with just a little bit of anxiety, as I felt the pressure of having an enjoyable time. For those who have yet to venture onto the ‘About Us’ page the DA has a fairly big (loyal not fat) Derby County fan on our writing books. Not only that, but we’re proud to say that the writer in Question, Richard Cutcher, once donned the famous fluffy ram head at Pride Park and mascotted his way through a particularly controversial season. I imagine one of the few things you wish to see when lying on the floor in agony recovering from a fractured jaw is a man dressed in a giant ram suit goading you to get back to your feet. Unfortunately for Reading’s Brian Howard, this was the very site that greeted him at Pride Park and the event caused quite a stir (see The Sun’s take here).
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Football magician Stuart Attwell has promised to further upstage both his world famous ghost goal magic trick and his even more amazing Dirk Kuyt goal phenomenon by awarding a goal before anyone has even touched the ball. Attwell said fans would be mystified and amazed when he blew the whistle for kick off only to instantly award a goal to the home team.
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The DA rounds up the weekend’s action by checking up on some the star’s Facebook statuses:
Continue reading » Manuel Almunia thinks Arsenal should have signed a goalkeeper during the transfer window.
Portsmouth football club have asked the FA if they could clear up the term ‘poetic justice’, after complaining that Italian club Genoa are yet to pay for the services of Kevin Prince Boateng (pictured above looking like a t****r from the Village People). The payment has been overdue at Fratton Park for over 2 weeks leaving the club’s administrator Andrew Andronikou fuming ‘you don’t see us not making payments do you? Wait, what’s my job again?’
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The DA’s Richard Cutcher brings you some of the funniest football video clips doing the rounds this week: Continue reading »
This Brazilian fellow will certainly be bummed out…
A footballer will do a bad thing tonight, and probably once again tomorrow morning new technology from the FA can reveal. The Football Association have employed Minority Report style Precogs to recognise dangerous situations and stop footballers getting their k**bs out before it’s too late. The Precogs, intelligent WAGS sent from the future, are able to visualise future events based on the new scientific formula: footballer + the horn = News of the World front page.
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